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Making sure you fit the demographics of a group is really important.

I can’t tell you how many dominant men post looking for female subs in the femdom groups I’m a part of.

In BDSM, we need to trust that our partners will honour our limits and boundaries. Finally, posting a kinky personal ad where it isn’t welcome shows that you think you’re above the rules.

Are you that special that the rules apply to everyone else but you? Most kink based websites will have areas where posting kinky personal ads is acceptable.

Let’s talk about how an effective kinky personal ad is constructed and the common mistakes that many people seem to make.

A big mistake that happens all too often is people posting a kinky personal ad where they aren’t welcome.

As any moderator of a Fetlife group knows, if you don’t keep on top of the personal ads, they will quickly take over your front page.

If you want to post an ad on Fetlife, Collarspace or another forum based website, make sure that you only do so in places where ads are allowed.

Hopefully, the linked articles will give you some insight into why even seemingly positive stereotypes can be offensive.These articles talk about the subject to help show you why Be aware that the language you use can be very offensive, even if you don’t mean for it to be.Something that has come up a lot recently, likely due to the increased visibility surrounding trans people, is using language that is deeply offensive, whether by honest mistake or bigotry.A huge turn off in kinky personal ads or profiles is the use of negative language.Someone saying “no fatties” is going to turn people off, including slim people. Be clear about what you want, don’t say broken things like ‘athletic’ when you mean thin (or thin when you mean active/athletic).Turning people into objects without their consent is not the way to attract a partner!