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The act of soliciting illicit and anonymous sex in a public place by male homosexuals.

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Don't try to get in, I have blocked the door with huge lumps of turkish delight and I'm listening to showtunes. I may have spent too long on the toilet but I've almost got some feeling back in one of my legs! I know what everyone’s thinking: I'd like to be lying face down in a cushion, with my mouth full of chocolate, and something lovely happening to my lower half. - I'm upstairs in our room rubbing your expensive creams on my knees, I just want to see what happens. He was mysterious and everything , he couldn't call 'cause he was smuggling Crocrobian children over the border to get to safety using his fucking knowledge of missile tactics and his inheritance and everything then he got involved in some underground documentary film group and was killed in a really tragic way for sedition, one of those guys, HUH? Well you just hand me that fuckin' shoe horn over there, I'll take this T-shirt off and show you who's the best around here!So here is a handy-dandy list of all our “official” posts (plus a list of relevant asks at the end).I know it can be a nightmare to dig through the tags and see all those asks and not the guides. Some of the really old guides still use that format, but as they are updated with more information, they’re edited to fit the new, less abrasive format. All posts are written by Jez (@typesetjez, formerly called “The Responsible One”) unless otherwise noted.I was incredibly nervous in my red leather coat and tottering heels.

Today, I was clearing out the garage when a large bouncy ball rolled into the drive.I know this because after last night's quickie on the sofa, I now have a rash all over my skin and weeping sores inside my vagina and around my bum hole.FML Today, I was hit by a car while riding my bike, so I called my dad for help.When he found nothing, he admitted to having his first gay experience this weekend and just wanting something to “even the field” before telling me.FML Today, while visiting family with my 3-year-old daughter for Halloween, I was berated, called a feminazi, and barred from all further family functions. I dressed my daughter up as Batgirl instead of a princess. I know, some guy with blue eyes, loads of teeth and hair and skin and all that modern stuff, who always looked as if he was on a boat and gave up his job in cybergenics to go and plant trees in some fuckin' place and he had long lashes that could quote huge chunks of Baudelaire as he stirred his cafe latte, and he wrote a whole load of books and never told you and when you found them in an airport one day you were doubly impressed and then he played lead cello in the Bulgarian orchestra and didn't tell you until you'd spent an hour twanging around on your ratty fucking guitar looking for the first two chords of Da Doo Ron Ron.